This has been a crazy year. Crazy bad and good. Good that there's crazy good. Good also that there was crazy bad. But all in all, I guess you could say crazy good.
To start off with, I made the conscious decision to leave 2003 and all its whinings and pinings behind. As I say to kindergardeners, "All done!" I was all done with 2003. I had to be stronger than this. And I had to watch my best friend go through the same crap that I was going through. When you watch your own life replay out in someone else's, it's bizzare. Even though our contexts were different, we went through the same reactions. For a month, K and I lived together, consoled the other while she cried herself to sleep. But slowly and surely, we both picked up the pieces and marched on.
The day after my birthday, I met Eddie and we dated for about 4 months. It was entertaining dating a lawyer who drove a convertible. I got wined and dined- but it was also a realization of how different other people live their lives- that is how the thirty something yuppies lived their lives. I wouldn't consider myself the progressive activist type that only hangs out in dive bars and goes to spoken word open mics (actually I don't think I've ever been to one although some folks I know are really into it). But, I don't think I'm up there talking about mortgages, dressing up for Boulevard (only the number one restaurant in town) or wearing stillettos to a house party. The other thing I realized too was how blind sided I am when it comes to dating. Felt like I got smacked right in the head with this one. But you know what, at least it was short and quick. Relatively painless considering I was out on my next date two weeks later.
It's been a year of achievements too. Got my MA in economics. Woohoo. I thought I would change jobs but I've been too lazy to look for another. The past 3 years or so have been so busy- work, homework, work, homework. I decided it's about time I took a break- at least for a year or so. I sailed to my heart's content every weekend, and when sailing season was over, I picked up my violin and started violin lessons. Playing the violin has been so relaxing and has worked a different part of my brain. You know how they rotate crops in agriculture, well... I feel like I'm rotating hemispheres in my brain.
One of the happiest days of the year was when I brought my Murray home. That little flea infested white, black and gray kitten (she has no more fleas now I promise). I've had countless hours of joy watching her grow. Unlike most cats, she loves to travel. We've gone grocery shopping together numerous times. She sits in her tartan carrier and watches while I pick out apples and grapes. We've also gone to work together- my friends at work love her. She's well socialized, loves to play and absolutely adores you when you play catch with her. Along with Murray, also came Nate. Things have been going well but knowing how blindsided I am (see two paragraphs prior), I'm not going to jinx it or say anything more about it.
One of the saddest days of the year though, was when Tim passed. I miss him so much. On days when I'm alone in my kitchen, I still have conversations in my head with him. I still feel like he's in China and that he's coming back- cos those were his last words to me. It's hard to mourn for someone whom you feel is still here and you feel will come back to you. It's like he's taking a long trip. I actually think he will be the first person I see when I die. And I hope he will be.
The year hasn't ended yet; there's still 14 days to go. I'll be home in Singapore enjoying my favorite sort of Christmas- a tropical one. I hope everyone has a good one :) It's been fun partying with y'all. Here's to 2005!
