Game...
He got game...She got game...WTF?
Everyone's got game. No one has the "game" market cornered. Everyone at any time has the capability of impressing or sweeping someone of the opposite sex completely off of their feet. It's been scientifically proven - watch Hitch...hehe.
Sarcasm aside, I am a true believer in this theory.
Ladies and gents, Shooter isn't a looker, he's not as cute as he thinks he is. What he is, however, is highly observant, terribly intelligent, and downright fearless. Go figure...
Game, to me, is a play off of Sun Tzu's Art of War (if you haven't read it, read it...now! It's applicable for both business and personal endeavors). The theory is simple:
1. Know your prospect as you know yourself
2. Put yourself in a position which makes defeat improbable, if not impossible
3. Buy a Lotto Ticket! Kidding...the meaning here is that you can't win the lotto if you don't first buy a ticket and play. In other words, you can't date the girl if you don't approach the girl and state your intentions. Be bold.
Proper application of these principles gives you an advantage that is is difficult to defend against. Okay, okay....it's not that simple...sue me. There is more to it than this - but these are the seeds. I'll elaborate on the rest later...
Playing the player....
No...not referring to me...well, ok-I guess it can refer to me in certain applications. Here's a scenario:
Hot chick...I mean SMOULDERING. Let's call her Chiquita Banana...Chiquita for short.
She's swatting away suitors like med schools do applicants.
Yep, she's the queen bee, the center, the Alpha female, the Player.
She's the girl that hooks guys into buying her drinks, taking her to dinner, lavish her with gifts, and with compliments, blah, blah, blah...
We all know at least one Chiquita in our circle, don't we?
To further the scenario:
Months ago, blinded by her beauty, Shooter nearly got caught in her web, but through the grace of the Almighty, managed to cheat fate and escape (ta da!). Still, out of morbid curiousity decided to stay close to see who else might fall victim to Chiquita's exotic powers.
Shooter decided to play aloof...staying within buzz range to maintain his visibility - not too close as to be creepy, and not too far to appear disinterested.
Shooter began the slow and steady process of establishing value in himself...but not do so in a direct manner...nay, such an act would appear as self promotion and would subsequently thwart our hero's attempts at wooing her.
Nope, he decided that others should be the vessel at pronouncing his coolness..hehe. He employed the use of his cronies to spread the gospel of Shooter. "Man, he can dance", and "he's a really cool guy", "he's funny as f_ck", etc...
Lo and behold, Chiquita notices. Her demeanor has changed ever so lightly. She slinks by, touching Shooter suggestively and gave a knowing smile.
It's working...
"My turn." This time, Shooter plays hard to get.
With the air of feigned disinterest, Shooter payed little attention to her, only in so far as to not be rude, but to be courteous.
Dissatisfied with Shooters inexplicably mild response, Chiquita amped up her barrage; the peacock opening her full array of illustrious feathers, if you will.
Still, our hero showed no change in expression - not even a glance to display that he is impressed or enamored.
Shooter continued the indirect display of value like the steady rush of the incoming tide. Friends stopping by and greeting him, geniunely wanting to hang out with him, further validating his qualities as a friend. In addition enjoying other women grace him with their prescence, further validating his qualities as a potential mate/lover.
All of this Chiquita sees...and takes serious note of. "This guy is different"
Occassionally, Shooter sends an obtuse message or gift. Obtuse from the standpoint that the receiver cannot tell if it is one out of friendship or amor. Effectively, he baits his line and teases Chiquita, enticing her to delve more into understanding Shooter, his qualities, and his intentions and further reinforcing her desire to get closer to him.
Ladies and Gents...the object of the game:
"Be not the moth.....be the flame".
Laying the foundation..
Hi everyone, I'm Shooter.
A little background on me: I'm single, educated, in my 30's, experienced, athletic, and dating.
On a frequent basis, I'll be spewing tidbits about my views on relationships, dating, sex, and hygiene from a decidedly male perspective. Please don't get me wrong - I'm not a mysogynist. On the contrary, I love women and enjoy their company and long to have a meaningful relationship with someone who is affectionate, intelligent, kind, godfearing, and confident. Until that fortuitous time, I will continue to date and (as my mother always says) "collect and select" to both pass the time and to enjoy the interaction.
So, let me begin with a little rant about "one-itis". One-itis is an illness that afflicts SINGLE men who dangerously fixate on one woman at a time. I say dangerously because this effectively is putting all your eggs in one basket. I currently avoid one-itis like the black plague. One must think of the time you spend with women along the same lines as the money you invest for the future. For all intents and purposes, they are quite similar. Your goal is to maximize your return on investment and minimize risk. So, when a guy spends all of his effort courting ONE woman of unknown value at a time, he risks excessive emotional injury and loss of valuable time and emotional capital.
So why not spread out that risk? Why not date more than one woman at a time?
To be clear, I'm not promoting cheating or infidelity or anything like that. What I am advocating is a more polyamorous and adult approach to dating where all information is above board. You effectively reduce risk and improve your possibility of finding the girl that fits you best. Imagine a situation where you're dating numerous women you share interests with and find that you truly enjoy the time you are spending with a specific one. You enjoy her so much, you forsake the rest. Wouldn't you feel better about making a life changing decision based on this epiphany?
Now doesn't that sound nice? You bet.
Potholes.
There are inherent problems with this method. Sadly, they usually orginate with your prospects:
1. Attachment- some of your prospects may develop attachment issues. Let's face it, you may too, but that refers back to one-its. The key to absolving yourself of this is to be entirely honest about your dating capabilities. Let them know that you're not interested in exclusivity at the moment and prefer to feel your way along with her holding your hand, constantly hoping for the best.
2. Klingons - this is the kissing cousin of attachment. More to the point, Klingons are exactly that: kling-ons. The stalker chicks who absolutely have to be the only hen in the henhouse and will make your life increasingly difficult because they will not stand to be Seven of Nine. Sadly, you must boot these alpha females. Nuff said.
3. Money - being poly amorous is a very expensive proposition. Dating is not cheap. Be forewarned.
4. Schedule - related to money. There are only so many days in the week and so many hours in the day. Juggling a dating schedule with work and friend/family committments can and will be tricky. It takes a steady hand...
Please understand that this strategy to combat the risks inherent in dating one woman at a time is based on strict HONESTY. The moment you lie, quibble, or glean over information, you sacrifice your integrity and you may hurt someone badly. It's been done - don't do it. Be clear about your capabilities, and if they see enough value in you, they'll stick around. It's your job to establish that value. More about establishing value later...
**Ladies, this strategy is not meant to reduce your value to us. It is meant to reduce the impact of you saying "no" and keeps us moving forward. Men are physically strong beings with fragile egos. A striking woman, 5'1" in stature, and dressed in a great outfit will easily crush a 6'4" 250lb man by simply saying "no" to his genuine advance. This is just one way to reduce that impact while not losing our motivation to find the one for us...it'll hurt, it just won't hurt that bad.
New Year, New Writer
Hello all,
I would like to introduce you to Shooter, a good friend of mine, who is joining BRL on The Big Aiyah as a new writer. I won't say too much but just enjoy his take on life. I look forward to seeing what he brings you and what you all bring to him.
Voodoo
